By Dennis Francis Kelly and Samantha Lynn Kelly 

Samantha: “To those who came to listen” is the name of the file on Dad’s computer. It was important to him that he’d be here too with you, that his words crawl up into some part of you that needs to be re-lit today. So I will start with his words and then pause to pick up where he left off.

Dennis: This is a letter to those that came to listen, and support my family as I move through the ultimate transition. First let me say thank you for being here. I am sure it is appreciated by my immediate and extended family.

Let me start out, for those that don't know me very well and how I grew up. Born and raised in the city of Wilmington, one of five kids. My mother and father did the best they could to provide, and guide us through life.

I'll start with my dad!

If I look back, I could find many things he could've done or handled better, but he also was a product of his experience and environment.

He could be difficult, strict and demanding, not only on me and my siblings, but more so, my mother. It took some years to figure out that most of his internal stress he struggled with was how he grew up during the Depression, going off to World War II at age 17, and never coming to grips of the impact that would have on him.

Losing his father at age 12, and soon to have a step dad after, and trying to be the provider to help his mom at an early age, he felt responsible to take the lead.

Nonetheless, he would mold me to be an independent thinker, and teach me things like the value of my word and a handshake. 

There were plenty of times where he would take us fishing and crabbing, which probably gave us the virtue of patience.

When I turned 12, he would teach me how to be wise with my money by opening up a savings account, with money earned from caddying and serving newspapers. And how to put it away to be used for something needed or valuable. This allowed me to eventually pay my way through high school, and some college. 

I still remember at that early age, going to the Wilmington Trust Bank at 20th and Market Street opening up a savings account, and to his credit and his word, he matched dollar for dollar what I had saved to open an account.

Certainly lots of lessons I learned there for managing money to keeping promises.

Now to the woman that would have a much greater effect later in my life when I look back and recognize all the things she did for me and my siblings. That would be my mother, Anne Quinlan.

Despite her circumstances, where she grew up losing her father at an early age, then being separated from her siblings into separate orphanages, because her mother could not at the time provide as a widow; it was traumatic to say the least.

Her dad died at an early age from tuberculosis. He was a professional baseball player and had to move to Arizona away from the family, only to succumb to the untreatable disease at that time.

Finding that information out as I got older, shed light on the reasons why my siblings were so good at sports like softball, basketball, etc. Lots to be said about genetics.

Anyhow, despite all my mother’s hardships, she would never complain, or even say a bad word about anyone. If and when she suffered it was always in silence.

She was truly a person that exemplified her stated belief, “God only gives you what you can handle on your shoulders". Mom definitely had big shoulders doing the things she did for us kids. She never preached Christianity or religion to us, but she was the most Christ-like of the Kelly family you could find.

And if there truly is a heaven, she will be there long before most of us.

Now, about my brother and three sisters. We all had a hand in tormenting my mother from time to time. That was when we were not fighting with one another. It was difficult for my mother to raise five wild kids and keep her sanity.

One day in the summer of 67, I woke up to find out we were moving. My mother couldn't take living with the verbal and sometimes physical abuse from my dad any longer.

She hocked her engagement ring to move away. It wasn't very far away, but when I was asked if I wanted to stay, I said I'll go where everyone else is going. The start of a whole new life. 

Things were not as bad as you might think. Of course my brother, being the oldest at 16, felt the need to step in and be the proxy dad. That would not sit well with myself or my sisters being bossed around by the "Big Brother”. My mother was too busy to intervene because she was just trying to get to work 5 days a week, pay the bills, and get food on the table. No, my dad did not provide any reasonable financial support…

[Pause]

Samantha: Dad was always generous with his time and his resources; as his friends here today, you know that to be true. May we be challenged to be generous like he was—never asking for anything in return.

One day in the spring of 77, 10 years after his mother left his father, Dennis would meet his match, Paula Frances Farnan. Many of you here today were at their wedding December 16, 1978, the day that larger-than-life crazy Irishman married a good-hearted petite Italian woman. 

Dad, who always said he wasn’t smart, which isn’t true because did the smartest thing by marrying Mom, his tough heart got softer, and the Earth’s axis tilted that day.

You know Dennis to be one powerful man, so you know as well as I do, my mother is just as powerful, just as tenacious, and just as humble as him. Dennis called Paula the unsung hero. Dennis, the jet and Paula, the fuel. As much as my father is my hero, so too is my mother.

Their unbreakable union was certainly tested, and tested far too soon. It’s God’s blessing Dad had a peaceful death, because his accident and recovery that followed was anything but peaceful.

In conversations with him, he would reveal that his recovery was ongoing, it was never ever over. Dad faced many trials and tribulations, including losing his sister Carol and his brother Tom; both far too soon.

While Dad faced many trials and tribulations, he has triumphed because while he didn’t want to become his father, all I want to do is be like Dad. And a man like Dennis Francis Kelly does not die.

As a Dad he could be difficult, strict and demanding—his patience limited—but I always knew where I stood with him and that he loved mom and I. One key lesson my parents taught me, consistency. Dennis was consistent in who he was and how he lived his life. Those of you who know him well, know this to be true. He was an excellent provider, confidant, and he could make us laugh.

Dad would say I’ve been serious long enough, 10-4, Dad.

His friendships were important to him and so was his sense of humor.

Just two weeks ago, he roped me in on one of his tricks, hiding mom’s phone in his computer room when she accidentally left it behind. Dad and I were laughing, Mom, not so much.

So in dad’s words, long story short, here’s to you and your life,

A life well and fully lived.

May God be Praised.